Dec 16, 2012

respect

Esok akan masuk hari ke 19 aku bekerja part time di Guardian, tertulis sebagai cashier tetapi aku jarang  di cash register tu, kerja aku lebih banyak melibatkan maintenance barang-barang dan kedai. Aku teringat sebelum aku dapat kerja tu, aku pernah cakap, kerja part time di Guardian adalah kerja idaman aku, kerana aku membayangkan kerjanya mudah dan hanya perlu melayan customer sekali-sekala sahaja, tapi sangkaan aku meleset, kerja part time sekalipun cukup berat. Aku demam selepas balik kerja hari kedua, badan yang jarang bekerja mula memprotes agaknya. Terdetik juga dalam hati mahu berhenti, mahu quit. 

Aku bukan mahu mengomel seperti anak manja yang tidak pernah hidup susah, tidak, cuma aku tak expect kerja aku akan melibatkan tengkingan, mengangkat barang-barang berat, berdiri sepanjang masa, menyapu dan mop lantai. Sejujurnya, aku fikir, kerja di kedai seperti Guardian sangat mudah, gampang bak kata bahasa indon. Maybe i don't prepare myself for things that i should expected. Betapa fragilenya diri ni ketika itu, terasa mahu give up, gugur jugalah sekali dua air mata mengenang perasaan keterpaksaan diri bekerja di situ. 

Tapi aku gagahkan  juga diri, tabahkan hati untuk meneruskan, tak mahu mengalah. Bukannya ada orang paksa aku pun untuk pilih tempat tu, aku yang sukarela jadi tanggunglah sendiri akibatnya. Teringat pada hari jadi aku ahad lepas, aku ditugaskan bekerja, betapa sedihlah hati, segala benda negatif masuk dalam diri. Ditambah pula dimarahi pelanggan dan family pada hari yang sepatutnya hari happy untuk aku. Nampak tak di situ?Bila kita dah memang tak relakan diri, apapun tak kan jadi, semua bendalah dijadikan alasan untuk menjadi negatif.

Kebetulan aku ternampak post kawan aku di Facebook, entri aku sebelum ni, dia buat aku tersedar, membuatkan aku mahu keep going. I took all the miseries in positive way, told myself it's a challenge for me. Sejak itu aku berubah, aku menjadi lebih gagah dan lebih positif dan Alhamdulillah, aku hampir tamat minggu ketiga bekerja. Apabila semua menjadi positif, semua menjadi mudah, aku mula nampak kebaikan aku bekerja part time di Guardian. 

Setelah berada sendiri di tempat seorang pekerja non-professional, aku sedar selama ini aku tidak pernah menganggap kerja mereka sukar, kerana bagi aku mereka tidak memerlukan ijazah untuk menjadi seorang juruwang, jadi mereka tidak perlu bersusah payah ke menara gading. Jangan salah faham, aku tidak pernah memandang rendah kepada kaum pekerja non-professional, bagi aku mereka juga manusia yang perlu dilayan sama rata seperti kita. Cuma aku tidak pernah menyelam perasaan mereka yang bekerja keras untuk gaji yang tidak seberapa. Hormat aku bertambah untuk mereka.

Siapa kata kerja sebagai juruwang tidak susah? Siapa kata kerja sebagai salesperson tidak susah? Siapa kata kerja sebagai cleaner tidak susah? Sejuk tangan aku bila menjadi juruwang dengan barisan  panjang pelanggan yang mahu membayar, stress dengan segala promosi, terms & condition yang memerlukan extra button ditekan di cash register. Silap bayaran jika ada kekurangan, juruwang lah yang bertanggungjawab untuk menambah nilai wang yang kurang. Pengalaman aku, kurang RM9, terpaksalah mengeluarkan wang poket. Mungkin anda fikir amaun tu sedikit sahaja tapi amaun tu amat bermakna untuk orang tidak berpendapatan /berpendapatan rendah seperti aku. 

Di Guardian, kami amalkan polisi 'Customer is always right' walaupun pelanggan itu yang salah. Aku pernah dimarahi pelanggan atas salah orang lain, nak menegakkan benang yang basah makcik tu, tapi tadahkanlah saja telinga. Nak buat macam mana, sabarkan saja hati. Bukan senang nak pleasekan pelanggan,. Perkara ni membuatkan aku lebih hormat pada pekerja-pekerja yang sabar melayan kerenah pelanggan yang sentiasa mahu betul. Kira macam kelas memupuk kesabaran pun ada. Dan juga belajar menerima dipanggil kakak, makcik atau lain-lain oleh mereka, takkanlah nak beritahu mereka umur kita pula kan? 

Anyway, bukanlah semuanya perkara buruk sahaja yang berlaku. Aku bersyukur aku tidak berputus asa mula-mula dulu. Aku berpeluang untuk bergaul dengan semua lapisan masyarakat, mungkin selama ini aku hanya berada di atas sahaja, bila dapat merasa berada di bawah, aku menjadi lebih bersyukur. Aku lebih positif. Bukanlah nak kata aku pasti tidak akan mengeluh/mengomel lagi selepas ni, itu menipu namanya, cuma aku lebih menghargai. Menghargai sumbangan orang lain yang mungkin nampak kecil tetapi significant peranan mereka. Tugas aku untuk menyapu dan mop lantai setiap kali tutup kedai membuat aku lebih memahami perasaan seorang cleaner. Betapa penat dan sakit-sakit seluruh badan melakukan pekerjaan yang mungkin nampak enteng bagi orang lain. Siapa tahu, mengemop lantai juga memerlukan strategi. Pendek kata semua pengalaman ini mengajar aku sedikit sebanyak erti hidup.

Oh tanpa sedar, betapa panjangnya aku telah berceloteh, bukan selalu mood menulis karangan Bahasa Malaysia itu datang, apatah lagi panjang berjela seperti ini. Jika English ada Grammar Nazi, mungkinkah Bahasa Malaysia ada Komunis Tatabahasa? Jika ada, kepada pembaca merangkap Komunis Tatabahasa, maafkan celoteh saya, kekurangan tatabahasa dan pemahaman saya amatlah dikesali.


Sekian. 

Dec 3, 2012

tough

This is how I've survived my current situation.

Nov 21, 2012

Setitis air




"Boikot-boikot ni tak praktikal..." kata seorang teman kepada saya baru-baru ini.
"Mengapa?" tanya saya.
"Kalau kita boikot produk-produk tu, kita juga yang susah. Bukankah anak-anak kita juga yang bekerja dengan syarikat-syarikat berkenaan?" jawabnya dengan satu soalan.

Saya terdiam. Ada logiknya.
"Kita belum kuat, jangan cari penyakit,"tambahnya lagi.

"Kalau begitu bagaimana kita hendak melahirkan kebencian tehadap Zionis?" kata saya.
"Perlukah kebencian dilahirkan?"
"Kalau kebencian tidak dilahirkan, apa maknanya?"
Dia pula diam.

"Kalau awak setuju dengan kempen boikot produk Yahudi ni...ada cara lain?"
"Kita tak boleh buat apa-apa,"ujarnya selamba.
Sikap inactivenya itu mengingatkan saya satu kisah yang saya dengar diceritakan dalam satu rancangan TV9 oleh Ustaz Zamri "Mantop" satu ketika dahulu.

Kisah bagaimana ketika Nabi Ibrahim a.s dibakar oleh Raja Namrud dengan api besar. Melihat api besar itu, seekor burung kecil segera mengambil air dengan paruhnya yang kecil lalu dititiskannya ke atas nyalaan api besar itu. Perbuatan burung kecil itu ditertawakan oleh burung-burung yang lebih besar.

"Apa gunanya air yang setitis itu?" Burung besar menyindir.
"Untuk memadamkan api yang membakar kekasih Allah Nabi Ibrahim," jawab burung kecil.
"Ha..ha..ha usaha yang sia-sia! Adakah api yang sebesar itu mampu dipadamkan oleh setitis air?" ejek burung besar lagi.

Anda tahu apa jawapan burung kecil?
Jawapannya begini:

"Aku yakin bahawa Allah tidak akan bertanya kepadaku apakah dengan usahaku api itu berjaya dipadamkan, tetapi Allah pasti bertanya apa yang telah aku lakukan untuk memadamkan api itu...

"Mendengar jawapan burung kecil itu, sekalian burung yang besar terdiam.

Ya, kalau kita umpama "si burung kecil" dalam usaha memerangi kekejaman Yahudi... siramlah walau "setitis air" untuk memadamkan keganasan.

Carilah BUKTI dan SAKSI keperihatinan kita terhadap nasib umat Islam dihadapan Allah nanti.

Status dari seorang Hamba Allah

Keterangan lanjut tentang produk-produk yang diboikot boleh didapati di http://www.inminds.com/boycott-brands.html dan juga di video di bawah:


Nov 16, 2012

Pray For Gaza

When I was whining for having no money and no job, my brothers and sisters over there are fighting for their lives, with no guarantee if there is tomorrow for them, astaghirullahalazim. Dear readers, if you are reading this post, I hope you can spare the time to pray for our brothers and sisters at Gaza. O Allah, please help them, guide them and give them the strength to deal with this O Allah. Allahukbar!

To the readers, if you want to give a helping hand, you can contact Aqsa Syarif from the third picture below. Or the least you can do is to spread the words and pray for them because Dua' is our weapon. May Allah bless you, my brothers and sisters.

Tatkala aku mengeluh tiada duit, tiada pekerjaan, saudara-saudaraku di Gaza sedang bertarung dengan nyawa, berjuang demi hari esok yang tidak pasti, astaghfirullahalazim. Pembaca sekalian, sekiranya anda terbaca post ini, luangkanlah sedikit masa, marilah kita sama-sama doakan nasib saudara-saudara kita di Gaza. Ya Allah ya tuhanku, Kau bantulah mereka dan bimbinglah mereka dan berikanlah mereka kekuatan dalam menghadapi ujian ini ya Allah. Allahuakbar!

Kepada pembaca yang ingin menghulurkan bantuan, anda boleh hubungi Aqsa Syarif di gambar ketiga di bawah. Jika anda tidak berkemampuan, anda juga boleh menyebarkan pesanan ini dan mendoakan mereka kerana Doa iu senjata kita. Semoga bantuan anda dirahmati Allah. 






Ya Allah, berikanlah kekuatan dan kemenangan kepada saudara kami yang sedang berjuang di jalanMu Ya Allah.

Nov 10, 2012

ocd


Do you guys know what OCD is?

Based on the description provided by US National Library of Medicine, obsessive-compulsion disorder or OCD is an anxiety disorder which people have unwanted and repeated thoughts, feelings, ideas, sensations (obsessions) or behaviours that make them feel driven to do something (compulsions). 

Well, have you ever feel the need to check and re-check things over and over again? Or do you have the same thoughts constantly? Or do you feel like you have no control over what you are doing? If your answer is yes, you may have OCD.

Why am I talking about OCD today?

I remember being told once twice that I might have mild OCD based on their observations on my behaviour. I was quite denying it at first place because I had this impression/mind set where this disorder only occurs for unstable/crazy person. Nonsense! Studies have shown that environmental factors may also contribute to OCD in addition to fear and anxiety. According to National Institute of Mental Health, OCD sometimes runs in families, but no one knows for sure why some people have it, while others don't. 

To help you to diagnose whether you have OCD or not, you can answer this OCD Screening Quiz from Psych Central. It can help you to determine if you might need to see mental health professional for diagnosis and treatment of OCD. I already did the quiz, the result showed that I probably have OCD. I have to admit I am quite obsess when it comes to arranging items. I love it when it is according to its colour, size or shape, it's neat! It's okay to have it that way, isn't it? or is it not? Hmmm, I think I need to consult a doctor to understand better about this. 

Anyway guys, if you think you may have OCD, don't be afraid. The first thing to do is to admit the fact, that you have the disorder and you need help for it. It's not something to be embarrassed about, you are just a human! Hehe, I think I talked enough about this, make sure you click the links given above and do Google it if you think I'm not providing you with the answer that you want. 

Till next time folks, take care!


Nov 6, 2012

phone call

Honestly, every time I need to make a formal phone conversation with someone, I get nervous, like very nervous. I feel like I'm being interviewed by a stranger sometimes. I hate the fact where your impression when the other person's talking is depending on the voice only. Even though we still can get the contents from their language and intonation, I prefer it to be a face to face conversation. Why? Because at least when I'm saying something to you face to face, I can see your reactions towards the message. I can know whether the message is delivered successfully or not, and I can know (maybe not every time) if the thing that I said  is affecting you.  When on phone, who knows maybe the informations are missed, I misheard something, got the wrong info etc. etc.

Due to all of the above reasons, I prefer to communicate through e-mail whenever formal matters are concerned. I'm not confident having a phone call thus I'm avoiding it as much as I can, but I still have to deal with it though, I know. I'm working on it now, to be braver in future, considering on my future working environment where more formal phone calls are needed. 

I remember I was so nervous making a phone call to Astro Customer Service to upgrade our package at home. I kept telling myself "just do it, it's not like I'm going to die talking to that stranger on phone". Lol. So funny.

picture from Google

Nov 4, 2012

graduated

dear readers,

In conjunction of my convocation ceremony which took place exactly 2 weeks ago, let's make a post about my 5 years in UTP!

I remember during my first two years, I cried a lot because I hate civil engineering so much, so angry because I have to follow my parents' choice. It never crossed my mind to take engineering course and  it actually took almost 4 years for me to accept the fact that I am a civil engineering student. I felt forced to study something that I can't even put my heart on. I put myself on denial and I even chose to do my internship at oil & gas company which was mostly unrelated to my field.

Only then I realized, I need to move on and face the truth, face the challenges because there were nowhere to run anyway. I have to admit, I still don't like subjects related to structures up until today but I can say that I've managed to survive those 5 years of denial and acceptance, praise to God.

Suddenly, it feels like only last week I attended the first class during my foundation year and only yesterday I became  one of the final year students. Time indeed flies so fast and I am grateful upon my study completion considering how hard I'm struggling with the course itself. I can't forget the date that change my life, built the person I am today, exactly on 14th July 2007, my registration date to UTP, Universiti Teknologi PETRONAS :)

Everything has become part of my memories now, even though i can hardly recall most of them due to the memory loss... I'm grateful to have the opportunities to learn, experience and meet awesome people as my friends, lecturers, classmates and partners. Indeed, it was a wonderful experience throughout the golden five years of my life and I'm proud to say, I'm a UTP graduate!




Sep 17, 2012

hibernation

it has been almost a week since the day i left utp. it's totally different now, i'm no longer on holiday break or semester break but to be exact, i'm on my jobless period.

i met my friends who already working and most of them told me to enjoy the holiday while you can. i do agree that once you've got the job and start working, you won't get the chance to take a break, easily. but i also can't help but feeling helpless having no guarantee whether i'll be employed or not someday. plus, both of my parents were already retired, i have to get a job as soon as possible, at least i can help with something...

sometimes it amazes me how big the pressure is when you know you are now responsible to support your family, financially, at least. i really hope i can contribute something to my family.

i hope for the best for my structured interview, may everything goes smoothly, insyaAllah...

Sep 1, 2012

unfold

true story.
this is the reason why I believe that a boy and a girl can NEVER be best friends. at least not for me.

Aug 26, 2012

two weeks

i should be preparing my final presentation slides right now, i know but i have to write this. 

i saw on facebook where a friend of mine wrote on her status that our (other) friend is currently on trip to overseas/other country. and suddenly this huge amount of jealousy came in. can't help it but i am indeed desperately jealous. i wish i got the same chance. i once applied for overseas study but failed the interview. guess i'm not fit for it. God knows the best, maybe some day, i'll make it, (for masters maybe?) insyaAllah 

and now living less than two weeks as an uni undergraduate student seems so weird. in the past, i kept denying the path that i took here, i kept asking why on earth i took engineering... it took more than 4 years for me to accept the fact that i am meant to be in this field. i'm still struggling to the end and now the end is so near...


i should continue my work.

Aug 15, 2012

brains

i'm surprised how two brains can work/think the same way almost all the time. i was surprised when i decided on/thought of something but didn't tell him, he thought the same thing like i did. it happened too many times but it still surprise me when it happen. maybe because we spend a lot of time together? i don't know...
someone even said that we looked alike, like brother and sister - funniest thing i heard about us.

he didn't know that i'm writing this but honestly i'm sort of thinking of him as my saviour. i won't make it if he didn't help me. he is my hero, he is my good buddy.

Aug 5, 2012


skip a beat

dear blog,

can you fix my heart? something's wrong with it lately - it failed to follow what her owner tells her to do. or maybe you don't have to fix the heart, but help me find the solution instead. should i listen to my heart or be rational and get over it?


even  my sisters found it funny, oh my!

you

This could be the end of everything

Aug 1, 2012

40

hello everyone!

it's 1st of August today and it's exactly 40 days before our graduation! how time flies! it's just amazing that we survived 5 years in uni life - well can't really say that we've totally survived! we still got few more left down the road but hopefully all is well...

i'm still struggling with my projects and stuffs, i have to admit sometimes i do feel like giving up but somewhere, the sun's still shining for me. Allah knows what's best for us, so let's keep the faith! i'm getting more nervous day by day as when Eid is coming near it means i'm reaching my due date. 3 weeks before completing the project!


i'm planning to reschedule/reshuffle everything since my life is a mess lately. got torn here and there, bruises all the way but hopefully i can fix it.

to my roomate, housemates, classmates, batchmates etc. let's cherish our last moments being students together!
i pray for everyone's happiness and success, may Allah bless us! :)

Jul 24, 2012

Save Maryam

mother

i miss my mother! mak! :)



pictures are from 9gag.com

Jul 23, 2012

family

Dear blog,

I was so happy for being home and celebrated 1st Ramadhan with my dear family, it was short but a meaningful one! no stress no pressure, I was just happy to be there (even though I spent most of my Saturday on bed for being to tired). may Allah bless them always! I'm glad I did make use of the time to the fullest, can't wait for the Eid break, I miss them already :)

well for now, tonnes of works are waiting for me! report, test and lab for tomorrow!O Allah, please give me strength to do all of these, amin...


Jul 13, 2012

someone like you

Sometimes you have to be your own hero. Because sometimes, the people you can't live without, can live without you. - anonymous.

Jul 8, 2012

of durian and baju kurung

it was one crazy week and i know it's going to be crazier in future. i have test tomorrow and i haven't studied a thing, can we just go with it? i should be studying right now >.<

i just want to say that i'm so happy with my 1 day break yesterday, nothing can beat the happiness of being with the family that is close to you like your own family. i would say, they are my precious keluarga angkat :)


yesterday involved family, food and chores!  but the most happiest moment of it, durian time! who can say no to durian??? i can't and i won't! hehe, i ate like a happy child getting her candies and you can't stop me from getting it more and more. we even got more in the fridge! bless them for such a happy day for me. i feel less homesick right now. good thing for me and yes to survival! 


Jul 4, 2012

graduation

It's less than 3 month before our graduation and before we have to say goodbye to our dear friends. It's not like we're totally not going to meet each other after this, but it's definitely will be different. I'm not sure how the graduated seniors felt about this when they were in this situation... I've started to feel sad about this. I've even dreamt about the graduation and farewell. It's going to be a bittersweet experience for everyone I believe. 

7 days before our 5th anniversary of being a UTP student. sebak rasanya.

Jul 1, 2012

people


Jun 11, 2012

habit

these days, i tend to blog about all the unhappiness i've encountered. it makes me feel that there's no fun to blog  anymore. when i read everything that i've wrote which referring to someone, i can see that when i'm in negative state of mind, nothing positive can penetrate through it, WHICH IS BAD.

i tend to make assumptions (which are mostly wrong) and later regret it. i can say that i cannot trust my instincts anymore because it's coated by misjudge, misunderstanding etc. i heard this wise quote from someone (which i forgot who it is) - when we focus on one's fault, we'll never see his (or her) 1001's good deeds. totally true, especially for me when i'm having fights with my friends, i see nothing but all the negative things.  i should change this habit, it's nothing good and it eats me inside. i deeply regret it and i hope i'll be a better me in the future, may Allah bless all of us.      

May 20, 2012

coming up strong

May 18, 2012

handle with care

don't play with my heart, you don't what you might end up with.
if you don't bother to handle it with care, don't bother to acquire it at first place.
i gave you once, you broke it.
i gave you second chance, you took it
i gave you my trust, but you stepped on it.

no more chance, you've ruined everything.
i was idiot to let things happened again.
no more lies, no more pretending.

sorry, but it will never be the same.

May 4, 2012

motif?

kerja aku makan sajalah agaknya
rutin harian ialah memikirkan apa nak makan nanti
semalam cubaan pertama buat bubur cha-cha kurang menjadi
tak mengapa nanti kita cuba lagi
(eh eh berpantun pula!)

esok nak masak apa?
bila pasal makanan, ligat saja otak memikirkannya
bila disuruh study ulangkaji? liat jadinya
entah mengapa tiba-tiba sopan berbahasa di sini
sudah mengantuk mahu tidur barangkali?

pecah kaca pecah gelas
sudah baca harap balas
(ehhhhhh apakah?)




sekian.

Apr 30, 2012

uni

current location: Environmental lab, Civil Engineering Department

i'm actually doing my lab where i'm here waiting for my oven to heat up till 250 degree Celsius, and the oven is like super slow and taking its own sweet time. i have to wait like almost 2 hours only to heat the oven because every 1 degree temperature rise takes up to 3 minutes and the current temperature is about 189 degree, imagine how long i have to wait for the oven to reach 250 degree Celsius! lucky i brought my laptop! haha, sorry for the whines, i'm just venting out my frustration a little bit for being alone in the lab  >.<


Apr 26, 2012

women

found this on 9gag, lol so true!
been there, done that!



Apr 25, 2012

appetite

day by day, i realized that i am choosy when it comes to food, or should i say i'm super choosy? my friends did mentioned this to me, it makes me realized that there's a lot of food that i don't like, can't eat or prefer not to eat. i tried to list down all of it but it seems like the list is going on and on. let me share with you at least some of it.

food that i'm allergic to, can't eat and i don't like it at all:
  • cockles
food/drinks that i don't like:
  • any products from strawberry - BUT i do like the fruit
  • any chocolate mixed with fruit, e.g. choc + orange, choc + raisins
  • bean sprouts
  • vegetables mixed with any fried meal - i'll always make sure to order food w/o vege in it; like fried noodles w/o vege, BUT i do like vege as a meal itself, i just don't like it being mixed w/ something else, i know, most people found it weird, i know...
  • i'm not sure what is  bawang goreng in English, fried onion maybe? and i don't like it at all
  • green tea
  • jasmine tea
  • oat
  • pineapples - i hate pineapple in my pizza!!
  • tomatoes
as you read down the list, you can see that most of the food/drinks that i don't like are good for health, why did i dislike them? you might also think that i hate vegetables, which is false and i shall say, it is just a short list as compared to the list of food that i love. I LOVE FOOD, healthy or not, the food that i love is way more than the above. if i list it, it will go infinity, trust me. i am grateful with what i have to eat, praise to Allah for the food and you know what? i love food so much that i found it is hard to maintain my weight, hehehe... 

talking about my weight, as some of you who like to urge/pressure me to shed some kilos, i appreciate your concern, THANK YOU. anywayi do watch my diet, at least i don't simply consume everything and dump it in my belly, NO. my weight is still in the normal range and i'm not obese if that concerns you. i'm just not your typical skinny girl, hohoho...

back to the topic, i think the list should be longer but i forgot some of it, maybe i'll update it next time. by the way, feel free to share the food/drinks that you dislike in the comment below. but despite all the preferences, just a reminder to all of us, as much as you dislike the food, do not waste your food. if you don't like it, just don't buy or ask for it, simple! till next time folks! :)


FOOD LOVER.

Apr 18, 2012

indeed

Apr 16, 2012

hello Monday!!

!

Apr 11, 2012

Best friends

i would like to dedicate this song to all my best friends out there, thank you for being my best friends and may Allah bless you always :)

here the translation of Japanese song by Kiroro - Best Friend


I don't have to worry anymore, cause you will be by my side when I cry

You always smile at me
I am blessed because you always shine before me
Things that we have missed hastily at time, that's the way it is
Faces that always being looked at
Forever hugging each other
Your smile has helped me endless time, you know
Thank you thank you Best Friend

These plenty happiness that I felt at this moment
All the friends that I have here, you the best present
I am blessed because you always be by our side
Surely things that I have accomplished here,
those things too give me strength (change to strength)
Faces that always being looked at
Forever hugging each other
All of your smile has helped me endless time, you know
Thank you thank you Best Friend

Things that we have missed hastily at time, that's the way it is
Faces that always being looked at
Forever hugging each other
Your smile has helped me endless time, you know
Thank you thank you Best Friend

Always always always my Best Friend

Apr 10, 2012

negative

i just realized that my previous posts in this blog are way too negative, full of emotional thoughts, i get carried away when i'm not in my best. i know when things get ugly like this, the best remedy for me is simple, just go home to reset everything back to zero. it's definitely effective because it's true, home is where my heart is :)

8 days to go baby!

Apr 7, 2012

life

it's sad and i found that it's so suffocating here, negative charges are everywhere where it pushed me to the limit. people hurt me and i hurt people, intentionally or not. i lost my rationale and i have become so bitter towards the end of the day, which is the part of me that i hate the most.

whatever it is, it's just a small part of life, more are waiting for us in the future... if i think this is unbearable, then what about the world out there? sure it's far harder than this, i need to keep moving on. i called it the growing up process, process to prepare us for our future. it is right after all, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.


p/s: idk what i'm talking about, forgive me coz my brain keeps jumping up from 1 point to another, it's hard to keep on the same topic though

Apr 2, 2012

last minute

lesson that should be learned but never learnt?

NEVER START YOUR WORK 1 DAY BEFORE THE DUE DATE, START EARLY!

HEHHHH, i keep telling myself this but i keep breaking it as well, i never learned my lesson i guess. here i am, still staying up late to finish writing the journal to be submitted before 5 pm. i have less then 12 hours and my brain is like hot and cooked. why i started late? simple, I'M LAZY TO THE MAX and i've lied to myself by saying i'm actually waiting for the "momentum". yeahhh right, momentum, now serves you right!!



Mar 26, 2012

according to neil



When you were young
And on your own
How did it feel to be alone
I was always thinking of games
That I was playing
Trying to make the best of my time
But only love can break your heart
Try to be sure right from the start
Yes, only love can break your heart
What if your world should fall apart
I have a friend I've never seen
He hides his head inside a dream
Someone should call him and see
If he can come out
Trying to lose the down that he's found
But only love can break your heart


p/s: false, i'm heartbroken and it's not even because of love

Mar 5, 2012

critical months

it's only 7 months till graduation, minus the holidays, sleeps and other stuffs, what's left is only few months. few months left and then you are entering a whole new world. you will be no longer a student and suddenly you are far apart from your circle of friends, unless all of you work at the same place - which is most unlikely to happen. i called it the critical months. the months which you wanted to do things, visit places, create memories etc with your dear friends. searching for the happiness, sharing the laughs and cherishing every moment of it. it's crucial because good friends are hard to find, harder to leave and impossible to forget .




pics are courtesy of Google


Feb 14, 2012

hijab

Let's spread the message, it is compulsory to cover our aurah, it is not just by wearing hijab, but also by wearing it right! Covering the chest is the best :)



saw this on 9gag today, yeah busted! that's what i said yesterday, gotta do it huh?
#ohterasa

Feb 11, 2012

true story



my current fav photo/quote

Feb 4, 2012

Muhammad

The guy; the future spouse. The most popular current topic, especially among the mothers. I bumped into this topic, too many times. It can't be helped but being asked, accidentally discussed or heard about them. True story. It's a lie if I say I haven't thought about it, at least a bit. Honestly, most of the time, I thought about the one I shouldn't. This post is more like a reminder, especially to me, who always lost in my own thoughts, wasted.

Well have you ever feel the regret, thinking about someone that you should not, and forgetting about someone you should? A simple and quick quiz here; how much time do you spend a day remembering our prophet Muhammad (pbuh)? And how much time you wasted on remembering someone who doesn't even worth your thoughts? If your answer says you spent more time on that guy than our prophet Muhammad (pbuh), shame on you. Shame on me too. I don't want to point finger to anyone but myself, I have to admit, I spent little time remembering our prophet Muhammad (pbuh). If it's not because of the public holiday on his birthday, I don't even remember when it is. Shame on me.

Rather than doing or thinking about useless things, let's change, shall we? Let's spend more time remembering our prophet Muhammad (pbuh), let's pray du'a and selawat. Let's become a good ummah from now on. May Allah bless him. May Allah bless us.


اللَّهُمَّ صَلِّ عَلَى مُحَمَّدٍ وَعَلَى آلِ مُحَمَّدٍ

Allahumma salli `ala muhammadin wa`ala ali muhammad

Ya Tuhan kami, selawatkanlah ke atas Nabi Muhammad dan ke atas keluarganya.

Jan 31, 2012

chaos



i'm buying these two books!!! well you have to read beautiful creatures & beautiful darkness first to understand the story, i already bought them, read them, and now i just can't wait for the sequel!!! :)


Jan 28, 2012

resolutions

i used to believe on new year resolutions before, but then i realized, it doesn't matter whether it's new year or not, you still can have resolutions to achieve and not only for that particular year. i didn't think of anything for the new year of 2012, coz i feel like it's just the change of the date (year). i may sounds ridiculous, i know, well i still have my resolutions but not specifically the 'new year resolutions'.

however, the good changes are still good changes. congratulations for those who already achieved their goals, good job! like mine, i think i already failed it i guess? i want to complain less. i've been thinking bout this since ages, but i keep breaking it - i always confused am i complaining or expressing opinions? especially when the situations are not my side. like what i wrote on this blog, or maybe like what i'm writing now, is it a complaint or an opinion? i'm not sure either. anyway, things would be better if i appreciate more and be grateful.

therefore, to my dear friends and bloggers who read this, i want to say i am deeply sorry if i said, complained or did anything bad to you, i have a sharp tongue i admit. hope i'll learn to control it, thank you for being patient with me :)


there goes one of my many resolutions, i planned to keep it short, so till next time folks, take care!

Jan 17, 2012

boyfriend

#warning - not a pleasant reading ahead

boyfriend/lover/partner
totally one of the sensitive issues, lately...
i guess i'm entering the era of "looking for a life partner is essential" where it's questionable to be a single lady and you can't avoid questions from the adults whether you have someone's special yet or not, hmmppphhh...

last night, someone asked me that question, out of the blue. i was speechless, and embarrassed. please, you don't just simply ask the question in front of other people, to be specific, in front of a guy. and that guy just stared at me, waiting for my answer. embarrassing! maybe it's just a plain, simple question to you, but obviously not to me, not to someone who is approaching the end of her study period but still single.

oh wow,sounds desperate, aite?
i'm not saying that i'm in need of a lover, that's sounds so wrong, hell no, i'm just fine here. i just don't get it, why people are being insensitive? you humiliated me by asking the question in front of the others like you already know the answer but you still asking it just to show that i'm forever alone. yeah i'm single, deal with it! it's not like i'm taking away your son or stuff, so back off people! unless you are my parents or closest family, then i won't have these cursing inside of my head. like seriously, IT IS A SENSITIVE ISSUE!
*ok cool down, girl*


i believe we all have our dreams about our future life partner, our future together etc. etc. , right? i believe that someday i'll meet him, i'd waited for him like more than 22 years, of course i can wait a lil bit more, just be patient, wait for another while, okay? believe in Allah, He created us with partner. so, to those who are 'extremely' curious out there, just to answer your question, yes i am currently boyfriend-less, but insyaAllah someday i'll send you my wedding card with my husband's name on it :)
 

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